Hehehe...

奸计得逞！

Disappointment and Light

25 September, No Lousy Books
Went to a branch near the sea. The evil security guard would not let my father park in their carpark, saying it's for staff, despite a sign saying "Visitor's carpark" (or parking, can't remember). It's raining lor! Still want to make him use the public carpark *grr*

I was fated to be late because I had to wait for a lady to switch on the lift at 9am sharp.

The job sounded very happening. Have to manage vendor and project, with minimal programming (I like!). The vendor is in Chicago, so I would have to do phone conferencing at midnight sometimes (I wonder why not the other way round). I was told they have a big budget (ok! Pay me more, everything also can!) But the killer was having to move and setup machines, and travel frequently between offices. I told them I couldn't do it.

They said they might have other positions suitable for me, but they involved programming. O well, I thought they wouldn't call me for them liao, not after I tailored my answers to suit this job, saying I would like to do less programming. And I don't think they would be fast enough for me to consider them.

Fucked up.

No more appointments for the rest of the week. Ass See Ass did not call as promised. Please be slower...


27 September, A New Date and a Ray of Light
SutarHarp invited me to an interview on Friday! It's for some configuration and testing position. Actually I hear the word "configuration", I wanna faint liao. I think the only configuration I can do is changing the theme for Windows. Nevermind, go there and find out more.

Ass See Ass offered me. 2.6k only, and still dare to tell me very competitive already. Wei you offer fresh grad 2.5, don't think I don't know ok. But I tend to talk rubbish at this time and bargain only 2.7 *bish* Sigh tomorrow need to bluff them I got higher offer and see how liao. Sux man, why I always talk rubbish?

I received a letter from Am Oh Ee to inform me that they had received my application. Erm, I sent it like, 2 weeks ago ley. The letter was dated 19/9. Bet they backdated it, those bummers. That's why I wanna join them.

Job Hunt

18 September, Interview @ Ass See Ass
Aquaria called me in the morning but I missed it. I hesitated to call back because I had no answer for them. I did eventually out of courtesy, but no one answered. Good. I had nothing to say anyway. But I wondered why nobody answered everytime I called. Did I do it wrongly?

Security at Scenery building is so slack. I dropped off at the basement carpark, walked through Ass See Ass' glass door and I could have walked right into the office area or helped myself to some free coffee at the pantry, but interviewee cannot be so rude, right? So I called my interviewer and went back to where I should be - the Ass See Ass' reception.

I was shown to a meeting room and a rather informal interview with 2 interviewers began. We started with the face-to-face talk! Did that mean no test? *Yay*

We talked about my work and studies. They asked for my transcript and started scrutinizing it, asking me how I found CS1101, CS1102 and CS2103. OMG it's the first time I ever came across an interviewer who studied transcript like that! Luckily I can still remember the module codes :P Turned out that one of the interviewers was an ex-course coordinator -_-;;

It was a maintenance position again. It sounded like they needed a runner to do debugging at Therestar.

When we had no more questions for each other, they produced a test paper -____- Insult me again... fresh grad dun need to do test, why I need?

The questions looked the same as one year ago. But I think still flunk lah, how can I remember the answers? And I'm not the kind to find out the answer because I would have forgotten the questions by the end of the test.

I asked if I could have a reply the next day as I already have an offer. Of course that's asking for the impossible.

After that, I was quite certain that I would reject Aquaria. I don't think I wanted to slave for a bit more money, which would go to the gahmen in the form of ERP. But the thought of lengthening the period of uncertainty made me want to accept. I flip flopped several times in the span of one night.

To take or not to take?


19 September, Extension
Aitee Too One invited me for an interview. If I accept Aquaria, I would not need to go for interviews anymore.

After talking to Mr K and Ms R, I decided to buy myself some time by asking for an extension and higher pay. I was offered $100 more (sigh) and one more day to consider.


20 September, The 负心人
No Lousy Books invited me to an interview! Suddenly, I felt that the pasture seems greener the more I walk. I accepted both Aitee Too One and No Lousy Books' interviews and rejected Aquaria.

Why sell my soul for a bit more money in exchange for experience in a field that I don't want to be in forever? I should make full use of what I got from this retrenchment to get a better job. My bosses are behind me. I don't know if I would ever get such a chance again.

I tried contacting Mr R, who has been retrenched too, to see if he would like to join Aquaria. Ya I'm telling only now. I'm another selfish person.

I applied for See Ass AiTee. Looks like a nice place.


22 September, Catching Up
Ass See Ass asked me if I had accepted Aquaria. I told them that I had rejected. Hmm... does the sudden concern mean there's hope? But with No Lousy Books, Ass See Ass doesn't seem so attractive anymore.

Aitee Too One is housed in an area with unfriendly terrain. When I walked in, the whole place was very quiet, with 2 or 3 people chatting in a room. Like nothing to do one?

My interviewers were 2 ladies, 1 of them being my former Maths teacher in sec2. When she saw which school I came from, I told her she taught me before. Hehe quite an effective ice-breaker. We talked more about my life than my work. And I admitted that I knew it was her who corresponded with me. But I didn't say that I knew she's here all along.

But too bad the work don't seem to suit me ley. Got to do actionscript, research on hp games and other mobile stuff, and work with ah nehs! They have plenty there, she said -___-;; Not that I'm xenophobic, but I think I might not be too gum with them lor, like that very lonely what. And it also means the salary cannot be high here...

The killer question was how much my expected pay is. With the point above clouding my mind, I said:

2.6-2.7

!!! Walau I siao liao! What was I thinking! Boohooohoo! I think this one no hope liao. They offer I also cannot accept liao.

I was told they would take about one week to get back to me. They are looking at a few candidates. If I were selected, I would have to go through a round 2 with my ex-sec sch vp whom I have no impression of, and some other members of the co.

Huh still have a few people apply here ah? I thought the recruitment page looks like a neglected one from a few years ago.

Sigh, No Lousy Books, please save me.

I Want More Money! MORE MONEY!

I went to an interview at Aquaria (name has been changed to protect my identity). There's a technical test that I think I probably failed, because I rely on the compiler and doing things the standard way without asking why not the other way, and the difference between the 2 ways. I mean, why ask when experts already say Way 1 is better than Way 2? So extra right?

O I program by copy and paste, that's another reason.

The interview was more like a casual chat about my work. They didn't ask the standard questions like "Tell me about yourself" (I'm boring?), "Why do you want to work here" (I need money lah!). I prepared for them, but don't think I still can answer lah.

"It's common to see quite a few people around at 8 or 9pm. But we start late. At 9 something am, the office is still quite empty. We do go back on time too, when there's no deadline to rush."

The working hours sounds horrendous. I still need to go tuition ley, how can I stay so late everyday? I think they only want to avoid the ERP, which I will pay to get home early. I need to wash my hair and wait for it to dry. Stone at my pc. Those people got no life! Want me to sell my soul to them? Pay me more.

So anyway, they made me an offer yesterday. A paltry 2.5k, 1-yr contract, 1mth bonus upon completion (sounds like an alternate AWS), the usual leave and medical benefits. I was told my expected pay was too high.

Walau! This is fresh grad pay lor! Sian half man! Because I did horribly in the test is it? Probably :P

I asked by when I had to give a reply.

Tuesday.

Yes! I have an interview at Ass See Ass(name has been changed to protect my identity) on Monday! O SCS, please offer me more! Even if you are at Jurong, as long as there's like $200 or $300 more, I will still join you! Horrible working hours also can (for this one, must pay at least 3k)! Anything for money!

Should I take Aquaria if ASA don't want me? :\

Present!

Yesterday, my father told me I had been mailed a package. I could guess who it's from. It's finally here!

But my father told me it's too big to fit into the mailbox, so he would pick it up for me from the post office.

The Big Big Mail


I turned to its back to look for an opening. Seeing this note,

I started prying open the flap of the envelope.

Result

The glue is damn sticky man! Got it all over my fingers -_-

And then I realised...

I should be tearing that edge off.

ARGH!!! I think my prospective employers will give me a miss if they ever find out about here.

What's Inside

A "cheerful" t-shirt to complement my bunny! The cloth is not thin and cheapo, and the picture is does not threaten to flake off after X washes.
There's also a pretty card (seldom receive cards) and a handout that will help me trick prospective employers into thinking that I'm capable.

Thank you! (you know who you are)

How Am I?

If you found out about what happened from here, it's normal, as I told very few people about it personally. I don't want to repeat the same story too many times.

My decision to leave was sealed after I got my increment because it made me realise the company was seriously in a very bad shape. But I did not reveal my intention to anyone else at work, except Mr K, because we feel the same. I wasn't sure about the others, so better :x And I still didn't tell them this is why I am fine with the culling.

Before I got that letter, I had been thinking if I should let anyone know my intention, for people might be offended if they got to know about it after I had tendered. Hey, they are contacts I have acquired with 2yrs of my life ok. How I was going to be thick-skinned to ask for a testimonial after leaving the guys in the lurch? And who could I ask to be my referees?

Now, I would be through 2 jobs without writing a single resignation letter. I can march up to my supervisors and ask them to write me a testimonial and be my referees. Suddenly I have people coming to me with lobangs :D

I found out that at the department meeting, the people were told that the company had retrenched a few people, but would keep their identities a secret.

So much for secrecy, when people from other departments can walk by and see for themselves. The management must have thought people only eat during lunch, or that there's no inter-departmental interaction. People up there must have been up there for too long and forgot how's life like down below. News diffuse efficiently!

The DH also told everybody to believe in the company.

OMG. I smell hypocrisy.

I have heard that the person taking over my work is thinking of leaving too. Good luck, everybody.

I'm considering including this picture in my farewell email:

The Diarrhoea Goes Strong

I've been wanting to post this, but I had been too busy.

31 October
My department was informed that the DH was leaving. There would be a meeting the next day regarding that.

1 September
So this is the last day of the boss who told me to believe in the company's direction. That was also the day the company had a colonic irrigation. Among those flushed out was me.

In the morning, my PM emailed me to inform me of a meeting at noon. What's curious was that I was the sole recipient. Funny... meeting always meet the whole team one mah... *shrugs*

At noon, she told my PL that they would meet later, go lunch first. Huh? Should be telling me ba?

At 12.30pm, while I was happily surfing net, I received a call from the HR asking me if I knew of "the meeting". Of course I didn't! She told me to go to this room, where the GM was waiting for me.

GM? Why would he want to meet me? I got biz with him meh? I only have meetings with my team, and now none of them were around. Cannot be good.

I entered the room. Apart from the GM, the DH, a senior and a lady stranger were there too, looking grim. Wa so many people. Since I'm not good enough for a promotion and I just got a raise, there's no other good thing that can happen.

I sat down. The lady was a HR from the parent company. We shook hands. There was a letter in front of her.

Ok. You want to invite me to your company ah? Cannot be right? What do you want?

She explained that the company had been undergoing restructuring and because of a need to further streamline, they no longer have a position for me.

Oh.

She recited the severance package, passed me a letter and asked me to read through it.

Nothing special. The package is very sad one. Surrender all company's stuff? *Idea* Hehehe. Great! Now I'm gonna be paid to leave! Yes!

I smiled and said I was done. She asked me if I had any questions.

O I would like a detailed explanation about how you arrived at this decision. Like why I was chosen over so-and-so. Ya right, as if you would give me the answer I wanted. Worst would be hearing my incompetencies after I kept being told I was doing fine. I thought I would have a lot of questions, but not at that moment. I needed time to organize them.

I just asked if I can encash unutilized leave, and yes, I can.

I've been saving my leaves for the day I leave, you see.

The HR then told me to sign 2 copies of the letter, and I did. It's a take-it-or-leave-it thing I guessed.

I wondered if it's because I had no questions. The GM explained that this was a very difficult choice to make. All of them looked through all the names in the company several times before they decided who they had to let go. The company has been very happy with my performance, so it really has nothing to do with my ability.

I'm really glad I didn't ask anything. He still didn't explain why I had to be picked. I'm expensive? Because the DH thought I just wanted a job? Or I didn't, and didn't seem to have the intention to improve myself? What?

The HR said she would arrange for me and the others to see a counsellor, and I could pass her my resume so that she could see if there were any openings within the parent company.

Huh?! No need lah! I'm HAPPY! And please, look within such a small radius? I'm better off helping myself man.

I said ok anyway. I didn't want to reject her, only to be asked why. And then there was nothing more to say. They asked me if I was ok and how I felt. I said I was ok with everything, maintaining my smile.

You expect me to cry izzit? I hope they didn't think I'm sad till only know how to smile.

That was all. I took the envelope and stuffed the letter in. I didn't really want to take it since it's useless, but it's there mah, those people would surely make me take it. The letter folded till so ugly, dunno who fold one. I stole a glance at the file in front of the GM. 3 more letters. I think Mr K would get it too.

I went out of the room, back to my desk and continued surfing as usual. But a while later, I stopped to think.

I think I know what the meeting with my PM was to be about. But because I wasn't given the letter yet, she couldn't speak to me.

Actually, I intended to stick around to get my AWS and use the time to get my SCJP meanwhile. The pay here seriously low man... Damn it, the company beat me to it! But a consolation is that I would still get my AWS, albeit pro-rated. Another consolation is that I would get a pay rise sooner than planned, IF I get a job real soon.

So now, my plans had been thrown off. I just got a rude push to take charge of my future. Is it possible to get my SCJP within 1mth so I can command a higher pay? Sure can! Cannot also have to!

I'm not surprised that this happened. My feelings for the company had been going downhill since May. The Mama project, I didn't feel like I contributed much. My PL could cover everything by doing OT everyday. My maintenance tasks, Ms R has been coping since I became her deputy. I felt dispensible. So it's logical to save this sum and let the rest work a bit harder right?

But why not the newbies? Let's see... Mr R is doing some chim thing with RMI that I'm sure I would take a zillion years to comprehend if handed over to me. Ms L is doing something that caused me to put on black face last time. And she's so much better than me at that stupid thing. There are 3 newbies at another team and I'm probably cheaper than them, but I would be considered a newbie at that project. Makes no sense. I concede.

I bumped into my PM when she came back from lunch. She had that uneasy look. I told her that they had talked to me. She asked me if I was ok (o man...) and put her handS on my shoulderS. Luckily not too hard, or I sure collapse. She told me not to worry (I'm not).

The PM got my team to go for a meeting. I knew what they were going to discuss, so I asked if I had to go. As expected, I didn't have to.

When they came back, they all had that look on their faces. The don't-want-to-look-at-me and don't-want-to-talk-to-me look. I understand. I couldn't possibly go and break the ice either. I just let it be.

Then it was time for the department meeting. I was preparing to go, but my PM told me I didn't have to attend anymore.

I was taken aback. Now that I'm leaving, I wasn't allowed to know the company's plans anymore? The DH was leaving, shouldn't I know what he had to say too? How 现实. Like I would steal their ideas.

The area around me was all empty, the department all away at the meeting. I was left all alone at my cubicle, for people from other departments to see. So outcasted. I had nothing to do, so I made full use of my time by sticking my thumbdrive into my pc.

I called Mr K to go out for a chat. If he got the same fate as me, he would answer, but he didn't. Huh...

Mr T came by. I told him I was fine and not to look at me as if I was dying.

When they returned, I wanted to ask them what happened, but I guessed it wasn't convenient as the PM was around. I'm not supposed to know hor?

Ms R msn-ed me to tell me that she was sorry it had happened and she appreciated my help. She asked me how I felt. Well, I told her that I'm ok and I would tell her how I feel nearer the date.

I can't guarantee that I would still feel happy if I didn't manage to find a job.

Nothing to do for the rest of the day. Made me wonder if I had been relieved of my duties from immediate effect. WTF, Day 1 was already unbearable with the awkward silence and if there no silence, it's "are you ok". What more 29 days?

I tried to call Mr K again, but no answer still. Looks like he's on leave. I sms-ed him.

Mr W mass-mailed his farewell. He got the axe too, but today was his last day.

People were standing around talking to the DH. I went to see if I could join in as I was bored, but 5s later, I left. Nothing interesting.

I went to say goodbye to Mr W and let him know he's not the only one.

Mr K called me. He got chopped too and asked me who else got it. But it wasn't nice to gossip openly, so I told him it's inconvenient to talk now and would call him when I got home.

Mr K was expecting it since yesterday because Mr E told him that his contract was being terminated and that more would have to go. Mr K chose to resign as he feared that it might reflect badly on him. It struck me that I could have resigned too, but then, I love money, and moreover, I had signed already. No regrets.